So today I should have been running the London Marathon. My first marathon.
I have wanted to run London my entire life. I knew as soon as I started running it was going to be my ultimate target. Getting to this point was 2 years in the making.
Running is my favourite thing.
One year ago exactly today, I ran my first ever Parkrun. I wasn’t sure about going because not only was it chilly and hailing, I had a sore foot. However I went and it was a personal best by 2 minutes, and I was just seconds away from going sub 30 minutes. That sore foot was to be the beginning of my arthritis, and it was to be my last run for almost 6 months.
I did however manage a half marathon, The Great North Run. It was slow and I hurt a different part of my left foot, but I managed it. I felt fit enough, and crucially, strong enough. Just one week later though I came off anti-inflammatories and onto methotrexate and I’ve been on a downward spiral ever since.
Back in the summer of 2016 I applied for a charity place for Arthritis Research UK. I really believed I would get better and be back to my normal self in time. This hasn’t happened.
Today, on marathon day, I am at home, bedbound. Arthritis has taken my left shoulder in the last 4 weeks. I can’t dress or undress myself. I can’t open doors with it. On top of that, inflammation has spread to my top of my spine and my neck. If I turn my head even a little either side I feel like I’m going to be sick. That’s on top of the normal stiffness and swelling I have in both my hips, my ankles and my knees. I am in one of my worst flares for a while.
Watching the marathon on tv has been a painful experience emotionally. I should be there. There is no guarantee that I’ll be there next year but I have to believe it. I have my place for next year. It’s literally next year or never.
The comeback starts today.
If anybody wishes to support me in this impossible quest, please follow the link below